


Chilled To Bones We No Longer Own

by Weevilo707



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canonical Character Death, Character Study, Cold Weather, Fluff and Angst, M/M, it's kravitz's backstory, kravitz is a very cold boy, so he dead but he okay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-14
Updated: 2018-01-14
Packaged: 2019-03-04 21:49:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13373739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Weevilo707/pseuds/Weevilo707
Summary: Kravitz had been cold for a very, very long time. It was something he'd gotten more than used to. Simply a part of him, one of the few things he could say about himself. He was a reaper, he had more of a knack for making deals than fighting, and he was cold.He wasn't looking for that to change.





	Chilled To Bones We No Longer Own

It was really goddamn cold. 

That wasn’t anything new though, in this part of faerun it rarely got above mildly pleasant in the heat of summer. Right now, they were stuck in dead winter, and had been for quite some time. There was a harsh blizzard raging outside, and Kravitz swore he could feel every gap and crack in the house that let the freezing air seep in. The flames he kept stoking in the fireplace only seemed to provide the bare minimum of warmth against the encroaching cold.

It was tempting to spend the rest of the day in front of the fire. The rest of the week even. Maybe grab the blanket from his room and huddle up to stay as warm as possible until spring came.

Sighing, he knew that wasn’t actually an option. Even in this miserable weather he had things to do. At the very least, technically he needed to eat, even if he wasn’t hungry at the moment. Kravitz considered staying there until he was, put off doing anything useful until he had the urge to make himself some food later. 

He still had that piece he needed to finish before the deadline next month though. If he could get it accepted and start making something off of his music, he could afford to move somewhere that _wasn’t_ perpetually freezing. If anything, this storm was giving him a good excuse to stay in and work on his music and he should take that opportunity. 

He guessed he could take that opportunity in front of the fireplace though. 

To do that though he still had to stand up to go get his sheet music and violin out of his room, as much as he didn’t want to move. Pulling himself away from the fireplace he started back across his small home to his bedroom. He was about halfway across the room when he stopped to look out the window. He’d been intending to check out the storm and see if it’d gotten any better or worse. It was still raging as much as the last time he looked, and it was to the point where he almost didn’t notice at first.

There were shapes, dark against all of the white and moving out by the tree line. Pressing himself closer to the glass, it took a moment for Kravitz to make out the four figures being buffeted by the wind and weather. 

Three adults, people he didn’t recognize, at least not from this distance, and a child he _did_ recognize. At least, he caught sight of the telltale horns that swooped back on the little tiefling girl that lived nearby. He didn’t see her around much, but that was because no one did. He knew most of the village wasn’t too fond of those with demonic bloodlines.

He had enough trouble dealing with people in the day by day himself, and he was only a half-elf. At least most people tried to be subtle with their disapproval when it came to him. He looked human enough that sometimes people didn't notice. 

From the look of the three much larger adults seemingly dragging her off somewhere, her reservations around everyone was warranted. 

Without thinking twice he threw on his thick boots and coat before rushing out after them. He almost immediately regretted it when the cold and snow blasted out at him as he threw open the door, but if he didn’t move now he’d lose sight of the four and he couldn’t have that. 

Running after them felt more like trudging through solid walls of ice than moving across the field that separated his house from the woods. Despite that he was slowly managing to catch up to them none the less. They were moving, but not at the hurried speed he was. They were still well past the tree line when he managed to get close enough for them to hear his shouts for them to stop.

As soon as they turned and saw him, Kravitz knew that he’d never seen these people around the village before. He had no idea who they were, but that wasn't important. One pulled out a wand, and Kravitz recognized him starting to shoot off an incantation. He’d barely managed to get off a counterspell before running closer. There was no fucking doubt now that they were up to something horrible, especially with the way one of them grabbed the girl and started dragging her away despite her obvious struggling. 

Fighting in a blizzard wasn’t ideal. Fighting at _all_ wasn’t ideal. He had magic, but he was more comfortable using it for a performance than a battle. Three on one didn’t help either, but at least the third seemed occupied with the girl. Kravitz could hear her spitting curses and insults even over the rush of wind and snow in his ears. She wasn’t dressed to be out in this weather, he couldn’t even see if she had shoes on. They must’ve dragged her from her home. 

One of the men shot a spell at him, dragging his attention away from the girl and he’d only barely managed to dodge. At least the weather seemed to be giving them as much trouble as it was him. He wasn’t able to tell anything about the missed spell other than the clear necrotic energy it gave off, so it was probably a good thing he got out of the way. 

The second man started up another spell, but before he could get it off Kravitz shot off a hold person on him. When the other tried to rush forward to attack, Kravitz sent them both flying back with a thunderwave. He'd learned that one because his mother insisted he have some way to defend himself if anyone ever took issue with his half-elf status. He'd never actually thought he'd need to use it. 

The third one hadn’t managed to get far off, thanks to the storm and the girl fighting him every step of the way. Without thinking Kravtiz shouted out a fear spell at the final man, and he was relieved to see him let go of the girl and run off. 

And then the tiefling girl looked at him, and he only realized his mistake when he saw the complete and utter terror on her face. And then she was running away. 

“Wait! Stop you’ll freeze to death!” he called, running after her and hoping that the fear spell would wear off before he lost sight of her, or that she’d stop running or _something._

It felt like he’d been chasing her for forever and that she’d slipped away in no time at all when he finally had to stop and admit he’d lost any sign of her or her tracks. 

_“Damn it,”_ he snapped, kicking at the thick layer of snow in frustration. He wanted to keep looking, it was his fault she’d run off. If she died out here it’d be on him. 

A fierce gust of wind nearly knocked him to his feet, and Kravitz realized he was shivering down to his core. If he didn’t get back to his home soon, he’d be the one dying out here. 

Reluctantly he started following the trail in the snow back towards his house. 

There was a slow rise of panic inside of him as he lost sight of his footsteps. The snow was coming down so fast and the wind was blowing so hard, they must’ve been covered already. 

Okay. It was okay. He wasn’t far, he just had to keep going straight and he would reach the tree line, and from there he could find his house. Or fuck, find anywhere to go that wasn’t outside. He wasn’t going to be picky right now. 

So he kept walking, and walking, and walking. The dead trees around him all looked indistinguishable and there was a sinking horror that he might’ve been walking in circles this whole time. 

Fuck. Fuck. He just had to… he just had to something. It was hard to think between the panic and how _cold_ he was. He wasn’t sure how long ago he’d stopped being able to feel his feet, and he was refusing to think about what might happen if he did manage to make it back.

If. Because there was a chance he might _not_ make it back. 

He had to keep moving. The wind kept battering him around and the snow hitting any bare skin at this point was so cold it burned, at least when he was able to feel it at all. He wasn’t sure how long he was able to keep going, but eventually all he could do was shamble forward, eyes glued to the ground to try and keep his face away from most of the blistering snowfall. 

When he did look up, he couldn’t tell if he’d made any progress at all. It was dark and only getting darker, and the storm only seemed to be getting _worse_ and, and…

He wasn’t going to get home. He could try to keep walking but he wasn’t even sure if he could anymore. He couldn’t feel his legs. He couldn’t feel most anything anymore. He needed a break. Just to sit for five minutes to get his strength back up and try to warm himself some. Then he’d start trying to find home again. 

Stumbling over to the nearest tree, he sat with his back against it, trying to block as much of the wind and snow as possible. It didn’t feel like it was doing much. Curling up as much as he could, Kravitz was unable to keep a choked sob from escaping him. He couldn’t tell if he was crying, his face was too numb. 

Bringing his hands up, he tried to breathe on them to get some feeling back in his fingers, but despite how cold it was he couldn’t even see the steam from his breath anymore. Maybe he wasn’t warm enough inside anymore for there to be any difference left.

When his breath didn’t work to warm him any he pulled his arms up inside of his coat, trying desperately to get warm and knowing on some level that it was useless. He was sure he stayed there longer than he should, but he couldn’t tell time anymore. He needed to get up, or else he never would. 

He could feel the snow blowing up against him, and all he could see was white. 

The only thing he could feel was cold, and he closed his eyes. 

When he opened them the first thing that stuck out was that he could feel again. Not entirely, it felt like like he was feeling things one step removed from himself, but he could feel. He was cold, but not in the bitter, burning way he’d been before. This cold was like a weight set heavy in his chest, the only thing that felt solid about him anymore. 

The second thing he noticed, was _her._

Kravitz had no idea when he’d stood up, but he instantly scrambled down in a kneel, staring down to keep from looking directly at her. He’d never been especially devout, but he knew a _god_ when he saw one, and he wasn’t an idiot enough not to show one some respect. 

He hadn’t gotten a good look at the room before choosing to stare at the floor, but he’d caught mostly blackness. The floor he was staring at was a deep, deep black, with an iridescent sheen. It reminded him of something, but his mind was too addled with confusion to parse what that was.

_“Rise child.”_

Kravitz shuddered as the voice seemed to run through the room and straight through _him._ He instantly followed through with the order, although he wasn’t even sure if it was an order or not but he wasn’t going to disobey all the same. He still kept his head down, not looking up at her and trying desperately to remember what had happened.

 _“You may be at ease dear, no harm will come to you here,”_ she said, and he found himself relaxing somewhat despite the confusion and fear. He didn’t know why a god (the Raven Queen, his mind supplied, although he wasn’t sure how he knew this) would need to lie.

It came to him suddenly. The Raven Queen. (the floor reminded him of feathers, of course.) The goddess of death and passing, keeping order in mortality and punishing those who would try to cheat death.

He’d been stuck out there, in the snow. It’d been _so cold._

“Oh.”

He nearly stumbled with the weight of the realization, but he managed to stay on his feet. The world around him seemed to hum softly in sympathy as the goddess spoke. 

_“I’m sorry, fate had cut your life short and sent you to me, my Kravitz,”_ the Raven Queen said. Kravitz slowly nodded, letting that information sink in. 

“Fate… so I was supposed to die there?” he asked. He couldn’t tell if that idea was comforting or not. He could feel more than see the goddess nod, still keeping his head respectfully bowed. 

_“I’m afraid your mortal life was not destined to be a long one,”_ she said, and somehow that made sense. He’d never pictured himself dying young before, but it’d happened. There was nothing he could do about it now. 

“Um,” he started, not sure if questions were allowed here or not. There was something welcoming about the goddess’s presence though, and he continued. “The- the girl I was with. Did she manage to find her way back?” he asked, doubting it. 

_“No, she joined us in the astral plane shortly before you did,”_ the Raven Queen told him, and yeah… Yeah, that was about what he expected. It wasn’t like he’d been close to the girl, he hadn’t even known her name. That felt wrong now though. If he’d been a bit smarter they both might’ve managed to get out of there. 

_“You saved her from an even worse fate dear,”_ she added, and that was a surprise enough to get Kravitz to actually look up at her. It was difficult to comprehend what he was seeing, all shifting feathers and forms. If he unfocused his eyes, he swore he could almost make out a face like a porcelain doll mask but moving like flesh. After a stunned moment he tore his gaze away again. She seemed to understand his unspoken question though, continuing to speak.

_“The necromancers would have rendered her soul from her body for their ritual. It would have made her entrance here a much more difficult ordeal. I appreciate you stopping this.”_

Oh, so they were necromancers. That explained why he hadn’t recognized them from the town. Kravitz nodded, bowing somewhat as he spoke. 

“I am glad I was able to help somewhat in this regard my Queen,” he said, wondering if that was the reason she was actually speaking to him. He didn’t exactly know anything about what the standard afterlife process was like, but he didn’t think that every single person got to speak with the Goddess of Death. Maybe he was wrong though, she was a god after all, if she wanted to greet every person who passed over he was sure she could.

 _“Kravitz,”_ she said the moment he finished that thought, his head shooting up at the weight of the way she’d said his name. He was starting to get the feeling that as a god she just knew all of his thoughts. His unfocused eyes seemed to catch sight of the mask twisting into a smile, and yeah, she could definitely hear his thoughts. 

_“Kravitz, I truly am sorry that your time among the living was so short. Fate insisted on bringing you to me, and for that I am going to offer you a choice,”_ she continued. He hadn’t realized she’d been sitting until she stood, and in the moment it took her to stand the world around then shifted and changed. The iridescent black floor was suddenly replaced with soft gray sand, and walls he hadn’t even been able to process were there fell away to the horizon of a seemingly endless ocean. 

“A choice?” he asked, trying to keep himself from gaping at the scene in front of him. For a moment he’d thought the entire ocean was glowing, but as he looked closer he could see the individual orbs of light swirling around slowly in the soft water. There was something incredibly peaceful about it. 

_“Yes, this is the astral sea, where the souls of the departed find peace,”_ she started to explain. _“You can choose to join the sea, as any soul not found guilty of breaking the laws of death is allowed to do,”_ she said. Kravitz took a few steps towards the gentle sea to get a closer look. It really did seem peaceful, he couldn’t quite fathom the number of souls inside of it. It looked like it stretched for an eternity. It probably did.

It looked cold. 

“What’s the other option?” he asked, and the Raven Queen’s laughter didn’t feel quite so booming in this vast space. 

_“I would like to offer you a job, my dear,”_ she said, and that was certainly a surprise. He turned back towards her, facing away from the endless gentle sea. 

“What kind of job?” he asked, because he had absolutely no idea what kind of use a literal goddess would have for him, let alone one who ruled over something as important as death. 

_“Do not doubt yourself, while death can be unforgiving and unfair at times, but fate does not make mistakes,”_ she told him. If he had any doubt about her omniscience when it came to his thoughts, those were gone now.

 _“I would like to offer you the chance to become a part of my retinue, as someone to help me keep those who have left the living from attempting to rejoin that world through twisted means,”_ she explained. He was having a hard time believing this was real. That any of this was real. The fact that he had truly died was hard enough to take it, let alone the idea that a powerful goddess would feel like he could do something like that. 

“How could someone like me help you in such an important matter, my Queen?” he asked. He didn’t… he’d never had much of a need to fight before. He preferred to talk his way out of situations if he could, talking and deals. He wasn’t sure if that was the sort of help she was asking for here. 

But well, he guessed making a deal with death and death adjacent things was a popular saying. Maybe that was exactly the kind of help she was asking for. 

_“As a reaper, you are to go and reclaim the souls of those who’ve attempted to escape the astral sea or the eternal stockade in any way you see fit,”_ she explained, and when she said that Kravitz noticed the island off in the distance. It was the only thing that broke up the endless horizon, a very large, stone building sitting on it. The whole building gave off an air of stillness and intimidation. He couldn't imagine it was a pleasant place to be confined to.

 _“Kravitz, whatever choice you make will be honored. Please feel free to choose honestly,”_ she finished, and Kravitz nodded, taking a moment to try to think this over. He didn’t know what use he could actually be as a reaper, and there was something tempting about joining the ocean of souls. 

There was also something terrifying about it. 

“You said fate had brought me to you, correct?” he asked, and he felt wordless approval from her as an answer. “Well, I would hate to argue with that. I accept the position as your reaper.” 

The moment he said that there was another shift, but this time it wasn’t the world around him but himself that changed. The strange untethered feeling he’d had since he’d gotten here left, and his form felt solid again. 

It was different from feeling alive, he clearly wasn’t living. His body existed, in a way he couldn’t quite place anymore, but it felt more like a very life-like doll than an actual body. He could still feel, but it was almost like it was removed in a way. 

It still felt cold. 

_“I’m delighted to have you, my Kravitz.”_

He took to being a reaper easier than he expected. 

Of course, he had help at first, training and support from more experienced reapers who’d been around for longer than Kravitz could fathom. There were skills he had now, thanks to his new dead form that took a while to get full control of. According to everyone though, he had plenty of time to master them. 

And so that’s what he did, throwing himself in his entirety into this new work. Telling himself that if this is what fate set out for him, if this was his purpose in, well, not in _life,_ but in existence, than he would embrace it. 

He didn’t let himself think about any plans that he might’ve had back when he was alive. He didn’t let himself wonder about the unfinished sheet music he’d never gotten a chance to grab from his room, and if anyone had found it. Wouldn’t let himself wonder if it would’ve been good enough to let him perform in a larger city, if he could have gone somewhere with that. 

Time quickly became difficult to judge in the astral plane, and so he had no idea how much time had passed between his death and his first solo mission as a reaper. Or his second, or his fiftieth. It wasn’t long before they all started bleeding together for the most part. He was still new at this, and he knew his missions reflected that. Pulling free souls trapped from entering the astral plane (like what could have happened to the tiefling girl all that time ago. The Raven Queen had been right, it wasn’t a pleasant process for the person), going after small bands of necromancers and cults. 

It started off as terrifying. In time, it became expected and eventually, in some ways, monotonous. 

This mission had started out as one of the monotonous ones.

A decent sized necromantic cult. He’d managed to appear before they could start the ritual they’d been planning, and it caught most of them off guard. It certainly helped that they’d chosen a small cave to do their work in, it didn’t give them much room to escape before he could strike them down with his scythe, pulling their souls from their bodies. 

When he saw two make a break for the exit of the cave, he cut down the last few combatants before rushing out after them. 

Into a sea of white. 

It wasn’t hard to catch sight of the two runaways, their black cloaks stark against the swirling snow. He felt like he was working on autopilot, taking them both down as fast as he could. He barely registered what he was doing until the two forms were laid down at his feet, flecks of snow gathering onto them. They had no need for the bodies. He’d leave them here. 

He wondered how long it would take before they were completely covered in the snow. At this rate with they way they were laying, maybe an hour or so at most? 

He wondered how long it took for his body to get completely covered. Probably even less time, despite the fact that he’d been sitting up. His storm had been even worse. 

He wondered if anyone ever found his body. How long it took before anyone even realized he wasn’t home? How long had it even been since he _died?_ If he went back now, would his home even still be there? Was his body still there, frozen in place? 

Had anyone ever found his unfinished sheet music? 

He didn’t realize he was on his knees, huddled in on himself shaking, no, shivering, until the fields of snow and the necromancers all disappeared from his sight and he found himself back in the Raven Queen’s court. 

_“I’m sorry, my child,”_ the Raven Queen’s voice broke through his panic, and he found himself calming. He hadn’t even noticed he’d been so- that it had effected him like that. Kravitz climbed to his feet, bowing before his queen as soon as he was capable. 

“No, no I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me, it won’t happen again my Queen,” he apologized. She wasn’t mad at him, he could tell that, but he still wanted to keep from disappointing her. 

_“You are still allowed to feel, Kravitz. You are permitted to mourn your death,”_ she said and he forced himself to nod. Neither of those things felt particularly appealing right now. 

“I understand. Thank you my Queen,” he said, and with that he was dismissed. There was more work to throw himself into, sorting the souls he’d caught into the Eternal Stockade. 

He wasn’t sure how much of it was a coincidence and how much was a deliberate choice, but he didn’t get another mission in somewhere with snow for a very long time after that. There was some shame in that, tugging at him from the inside, but it was outweighed by relief. 

Somewhere along the line, he went from being a new reaper, to just a reaper. Some of the oldest ones ‘retired,’ choosing to finally join the rest of the souls in the astral sea. It was an option always open to all of them who’d one been alive in the Raven Queen’s retinue, the chance to be in peace with every other person who’d passed. 

That option hadn’t gotten anymore appealing to Kravitz since he first arrived here. He wasn’t alive anymore, but there was something comforting about continuing to exist as he was. To keep being himself.

Maybe that was why after so long, he started to loosen up. The Raven Queen had insisted that he let himself continue to feel, to mourn the life he’d lost. 

He wasn’t going to do that second one, and there were some emotions he still preferred not to feel. There were others that he figured after so long dead he _couldn’t_ feel anymore. Simply put, he’d been too cold for too long for anything too particularly pleasant. 

There were things he still had though, and he let himself have them. Anger, that one was easy. After so long fighting for the order of life and death, it was simple to get angry at those who went against those rules for their own selfish gains. Pride was another simple one for him. With centuries fighting under his belt, he was good at it, even if it had never come naturally to him. 

Humor was something that surprised him, he hadn’t expected himself to be able to laugh at much after everything he’d seen. 

He’d been out once though, attempting to sneak into the base of a cult that had been regularly stealing souls out of the astral sea to appease a dragon made of pure light. A cult member had managed to catch him off guard. It had been someone extremely low ranking in the membership it seemed, they hadn’t realized who or what he was right away. 

He’d panicked, attempted to dig up the skills that let him talk his way out of situations when he’d been alive. 

He ended up putting on an accent. 

Somehow, it had _worked._ He managed to get away from the cultist without having to attack prematurely and give away their awareness of the situation. When he’d gone back to the astral plane, he ended up laughing over how ridiculous it had been. 

From then on, whenever he found himself having to speak to the bounties he was after, he used the accent. It was a ridiculous thing to do, but it was something to do. Some little distinction to remind himself that there were times when he was working, and times where he _wasn’t._ The time when he wasn’t was little, because he wanted it to be. He didn’t have much of an existence outside of being a reaper anymore, he hadn’t for a very very long time. It was still there though, as much as he minimized it. 

Time was hard to gauge, and so he couldn’t pinpoint where he had gone from being a regular reaper, to being an _old_ reaper. Maybe it was when he found he was being trusted by his Queen with their most dangerous bounties, or when he had a new reaper shadow him for her training. 

Maybe it was when he realized he couldn’t remember most of his life from when he was alive. The new reaper had asked for his full name, and he was struck with the fact that he couldn’t remember if he even had one. He tried to remember the name of the village he grew up in, or what his parents had looked like. He tried to think of what the layout of his home had been, but all he could recall was what the fireplace looked like, and the desk in his room covered in unfinished sheet music.

He couldn’t, no matter how hard he tried, remember what the music had sounded like. 

He wondered if he’d been any good. 

(He tried, desperately, to remember what it felt like to be warm and alive. All he could recall was the burning cold of snow battering him until he couldn’t feel anything anymore.) 

He figured it was better if he couldn’t remember these things. He’d been in this role for so long, and it was easier if he could be impartial. If he started letting himself long for whatever meager life he could have had it might be harder to tell those trying for a second chance no. It wasn’t like he’d never made deals, death was a messy process after all. Sometimes not everyone who’d joined a cult or were brought into necromantic practices were deserving of a one way ticket to the eternal stockade.

The Raven Queen was very insistent that they keep their hearts about them with this. So even if he was pushing down any connection to his old life, he tried to keep himself from shutting out life in general. It was a hard balance to maintain. 

Kravitz hadn’t been prepared for that balance he’d meticulously kept in check over the seemingly endless centuries to fall so suddenly to pieces. 

“My name is Taako and you look like you’re made of salt!” 

Well, Kravitz could certainly chalk that up as one of the most unique ways a bounty had ever addressed him. He was kind of glad for it, he appreciated humor. 

There was a snowstorm raging outside of the strange crystal lab they were in, and the utter ridiculousness of the three happenstance bounties that he’d come across was welcomed. He could use the distraction from the deep cold that seeped through the lab. 

The other two first impressions weren’t quite as unique, Magnus Burnside glaring unflinchingly back at him. Most necromancers he met were tricky and cunning, they didn’t prefer to stare literal death in the face like that. There were a few though who he found clung to life out of sheer stubborn pride though. Those cases would fight him for all their worth, would meet him with every bit of power they had. So it was uncommon for someone to meet him like that, but not unheard of. 

Merle goddamn Highchurch, he had just started crying. Not the reaction Kravitz had expected for the highest bounty he’d ever seen, but definitely not the first time it’d happened. 

Nothing after that moment proved to be normal. From their combined death count, he expected this not to be easy, but not in the way it ended up being. They weren’t skilled fighters, or they were, but it seemed like their biggest advantage was their ability to keep baffling him. 

He manages to take Merle’s arm. He comes back fifteen minutes later with a fully functioning wooden replacement, teeming with the blessing of pan. He finds all three of them paralyzed on the ground, what should’ve been the easiest targets he’d ever claimed. He just _misses._ He fumbled like it was one of his first ever bounties. 

He attempts to blow them up with a crystalline bomb. The elf gleefully pulls out a fork and _eats the goddamn thing._

It was ridiculous. He was fucking flustered, which hadn’t happened since he first created the silly accent for himself. It was like fate herself was working overtime to try to keep him from doing his job. It wouldn’t be the first time. 

“You know, I will say, if you wanted to lure me in there you should’ve stayed handsome my fella.” 

It certainly wasn’t the first time someone’s attempted to flirt with him to get out of their sentence. People backed in a corner will try pretty much anything to try to find some way out. It was always very transparent and never a good strategy. 

This was, however, the first time someone implied they would’ve happily complied if _he’d_ been the one flirting. Hell, it was the first time someone had given him advice on how to catch them, even jokingly. Which, from what he could see of the elf, Taako, despite the strange red suit he was wearing, he wasn’t unattractive in the slightest.

And that wasn’t something he let himself think on for long. Instead he focused on anger, rage that these three were making a complete mockery of everything he’d worked so hard for so long to protect. The only reason he was still _himself,_ they brushed off like it was nothing. 

Then Legion nearly destroyed everything, and the only reason it hadn’t was because of those three baffling idiots. 

For the first time in a very, very long time, he had no fucking idea what he was supposed to do. 

He prayed to the Raven Queen, and her only response was an amused assurance in her trust in his judgment. 

So, he went back to his basics. He made a deal. He owed them, and he knew the system of death well enough to pick out a few loopholes to allow for their bounties to be erased. As long as they didn’t cheat death again, Kravitz figured he could try to forget the whole incident had ever happened. 

Kravitz wasn’t a very good judge of time, but he was _certain_ the gap between him pardoning them and 11 more deaths showing up in his book next to each of their names was minuscule at best. That didn’t even account for the _thousands_ of deaths for each person in an entire town that had shown up all at once. They’d never seen anything like that before.

“I’m sorry my Queen. You trusted my judgment and I was clearly wrong about them. I’ll retrieve their souls at once,” he said, having gone to the Raven Queen as soon as he’d seen the new entries in his ledger. 

_“I don’t believe you were wrong my dear,”_ the Raven Queen said, surprising him. _“It seems those three have recently been employed as vessels of fate.”_

Fate. Of course. He knew his Queen had a delicate relationship with the Lady Istus. Death and Fate were often thoroughly intertwined, but that didn’t make the whole thing any less frustrating. 

_“I would appreciate it if you could go speak to them for me and figure out exactly what is going on, Kravitz. Even as instruments of fate, we cannot allow such transgressions to go without note,”_ she said, and Kravitz nodded, standing up from where he’d been kneeling before her. 

“Of course, my Queen,” he said, and with that he was dismissed. 

He couldn’t bring himself to be surprised when he found out they lived on that fake moon that had showed up in the sky a little while ago. Kravitz had been curious about the thing since it appeared, and more curious about how none of the living seemed to question it, but it hadn’t been a concern for his job until now. It was a little nice to have an excuse to figure out what was up with all of that though. So, he managed to figure out where on the moon they lived, and then he waited for them to return. 

He hadn’t expected Taako to show up alone, bruised and exhausted, but he wasn’t sure why he expected anything with them anymore. 

The Raven Queen had told him to figure out what was going on. So he tried to appear as non-threatening as possible as he asked Taako for an explanation of all of the unexplained deaths. 

To his surprise, Taako had grabbed a juice box out of their fridge, threw himself onto the couch on the other side of the room, put his feet up and told him to ‘sit your pretty self back down because _oh boy_ does Taako have a story for you.’ 

Kravitz had laughed, taken off guard by how casual he was being, especially considering their last encounter. They'd left on good terms, or at least with a deal, but they'd still tried to kill each other. Still, he sat down on the other couch across from him like Taako told him to and prepared for 'the story'. Taako did begin to explain the whole situation, not only with the deaths down in Refuge, but the whole operation with the moon base as well. Apparently, the organization up here was called the Bureau of Balance. 

As he explained, Kravitz could start to see why the Lady Istus would take them as bound by fate. It was all hard to believe, but Kravitz remembered the wars. He’d always thought they’d ended abruptly, but he’d assumed it was his poor sense of time getting the better of him again. But no, it truly had been that in one moment, every living person in the world had forgotten about the war and its cause. 

It was frankly a little terrifying. 

Despite his better judgment, Kravitz found himself a bit enraptured by Taako as he spoke. He was both ridiculous and fascinating as he would go off on tangents only somewhat related to whatever he was explaining at the moment. He kept gesturing wildly even with how tired he seemed, and it was lucky he had a juice box or else Kravitz figured there'd be juice everywhere.

When he felt the Raven Queen calling him back to the astral plane, there was a distinct twinge of disappointment that had nearly left him speechless. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d actually wanted to be with someone. 

It’d been a bit of an impulse to give Taako the frequency to his stone of farspeech. It’d been _such_ an impulse that he’d had to conjure a stone right there, since he didn’t actually own one. He’d never needed to converse with the living after all. He just hoped Taako thought he was pulling it out of some pocket dimension where he kept his belongings or something. 

With that he headed back to the astral plane and told his Queen what he’d learned, sparing her all the extra details Taako had given him. If she felt any of it was important well, his mind kept wandering and he knew she had access to all of that.

 _“Thank you Kravitz. Feel free to see this elf again if you feel the need to, but I believe we can hold from putting out any bounties considering the circumstances,”_ she said. That made sense, when Taako told him everything that they’d been through, or at least everything he’d managed to in the time they spoke, he figured it was extenuating circumstances enough to keep from putting out any bounties. 

He’d told Taako that he’s contact him to continue their conversation at another time, but it didn’t seem like that was needed anymore. The Raven Queen had said only if he felt he needed to, and while there was a part of him he was struggling to ignore that wanted to, that didn’t quite count. 

It felt like he didn’t have very long to ponder over this, because after a bit the stone of farspeech he’d created in his fumbled panic began glowing and buzzing. The conversation he’d had with Taako in that moment had gone by so fast. He’d barely had time to process what was happening before he had somehow agreed to meet up at a very strange sounding venue to finish their previous conversation. 

Was everything about the living so fast? Maybe that was why he could barely remember anything from his life. It had been so short, and if he’d moved anywhere close to the speed Taako did it was no wonder it was all a blur now. 

He wasn’t sure what he was expecting when he showed up, but that was because he was trying to keep himself from expecting anything anymore with this particular group, _especially_ with Taako. 

Kravitz dropped his accent when he gets there, admitting to himself that he couldn't excuse this as something for work anymore. They talked about the issue with all of the deaths, but it was a formality, even though Taako didn’t know it. 

He knew should leave as soon as the discussion was over, but there wasn’t anything calling him away this time. Taako somehow managed to surprise him despite Kravitz attempting to lose any expectations for how this night would go, just by being _honest._ It was the strangest way to go about it, but he was charmed none the less. Kravitz ended up telling him about wanting to be a conductor, and he wasn’t even sure if he’d ever actually _told_ anyone that before. The Raven Queen knew, but she had access to his thoughts. He owed his continued existence to her, there weren’t any secrets he wanted to keep there.

Taako casually reached over to adjust Kravitz’s form on the wheel, and his touch was so fucking _warm._ He could barely manage to stumble out something about everyone’s souls being safe and enjoying the rest of the class.

And he _did._ It was ridiculous, but Kravitz had always liked art, even if his vase had turned out a little shitty. Taako had said he could blame that on the wine, even though he’d drank quite a bit more and his bowl had come out proportionally better. Kravitz had pointed it out and Taako nodded, saying that he could blame it on the fact that he hadn’t drank _enough_ wine. 

Taako was ridiculous. He was almost frustratingly carefree except in those moments where he grounded himself without warning. He was bright and loud and _alive_ in a way Kravitz hadn’t experienced in so long. Wasn’t sure if he’d ever experienced. 

Everything about him was simply enthralling, and Kravitz ended up getting a little caught up in the whole thing. Even when he felt the energy of an _incredibly_ powerful lich around and Taako’s arcane focus attempted to double murder him, he couldn’t quite focus on those things. He couldn’t because Taako was carefully laying out every magic artifact he owned in an attempt to help locate the source, and it was so horribly endearing. He should be worrying about the lich. Instead he was asking Taako if they could meet up again. 

When he stepped back into the astral plane, everything was still and cold, and Kravitz realized how ridiculous he was being. 

If Taako called to meet up again (he wouldn’t, why in the world would he? He was alive and dynamic and _warm._ And Kravitz wasn’t.) he’d have to tell him no. This wasn’t an idea he could entertain anymore. He debated destroying the stone of farspeech, since he literally only had it as a way to reach Taako, but he didn’t.

He should have, but he didn’t. 

Instead he simply threw himself into his work again. He tried to figure out if he could find some information on the lich he’d felt. He took up extra bounties where he could find them. 

He wasn’t sure how long it had been when the Raven Queen requested his presence, but he’d always been bad with time. It couldn’t have been long though. He felt like he’d been paying more attention to it since his meeting with Taako, despite his every attempt not to. 

_“Kravitz,”_ she started, and there was a tone to her voice he couldn’t quite place. 

“Yes, my Queen?” he asked, and for once he had no real idea what her reason for her calling him to her was. 

_“Kravitz, you know you are allowed to be happy while under my service, correct?”_ she asked, throwing him for a loop. He’d say he had no idea where this had come from, but well, he did. 

“I am happy,” he said, and it wasn’t technically a lie. He enjoyed his work, he found meaning in it. That was all he needed for so long, there was no reason for that to change now. 

_“You are content. You’ve been content for a long time. You are allowed to be happy,”_ she insisted. She wasn’t wrong, which, of course she wasn’t. She was a god. 

“I will… take your words into consideration,” he said, and it was certainly the first time he’d ever said something like that to her. It was probably foolish of him to say anything below yes to her, but she wasn’t a cruel god. He knew she wouldn’t be upset with him for something like this. 

_“I know you will Kravitz,”_ she said, and with that he was dismissed. 

And alone. 

And not happy. 

And cold.

He had his stone of farspeech in his hand, and it was dumb of him for thinking he wasn’t going to follow through on her advice in a heartbeat. 

“Taako?” he asked into the stone, and as soon as the name left him he realized he had no idea how long it had been since they last spoke, or what time of day it was now. There was a few agonizing seconds where Kravitz debated how bad of a mistake he might’ve made before the other end of the stone crackled to life.

“My dude! I was wondering if you were gonna call or not. You know, I’m not gonna put _all_ the work in here. Taako doesn’t go chasing after guys,” he said, and Kravitz found a smile stretching across his face despite his best efforts otherwise.

“I’m sorry to keep you waiting so long, work has been a bit hectic lately,” he said, and that wasn’t a lie. He’d had almost constant bounties since his last meeting with Taako. 

“Your work as death? Yeah no tell me about it, the Director’s really jacked up our training bullshit. I fucking never have a _break_ anymore, like I know we're supposed to be saving the world and all but it's bullshit. Cha' boy deserves a spa day,” he complained, and even though Kravitz couldn’t see him, he could imagine the way Taako was throwing his arms around in frustration.

“I’m sorry to hear about that. Do you think you could possibly spare the time to meet up sometime, uh. I don’t actually know what time it is there for you now,” he said, and he could hear Taako laughing softly on the other end of the stone.

“It’s like fuckin three in the morning dog, but yeah I think I could swing ditching training tomorrow,” he said, and the smile dropped from Kravitz’s face at that. 

“Oh shit, Taako I’m sorry I had no idea it was so late,” he apologized. 

“Don’t even sweat it. Was still awake anyway, being an elf has its perks,” he said, and Kravitz couldn’t actually remember if that was a thing or not. He was a half-elf, but he was pretty sure he slept. “Anyway, I’m good for tomorrow if you are. Where you wanna meet? I can get transportation to pretty much anywhere,” he added. 

“Uh, we can, um, I-” he fumbled, giving up when Taako started laughing once again. 

“You didn’t plan this far ahead, did you my guy?” he asked, and Kravitz would’ve been embarrassed if it wasn’t for the fond tone in his voice. 

“Not in the slightest,” he admitted without shame. Taako seemed endeared by it at least. 

“Yeah, didn’t think so. Listen, how about you meet me in Neverwinter around six at uh, fantasy olive garden? I have an unlimited pasta pass I’ve been meaning to try out. We can uh, go see a play or something afterwards? Whatever you’re into,” Taako suggested, and Kravitz found himself nodding even though the elf couldn’t see him. 

“That sounds wonderful Taako, I can’t wait,” he said, and he really did mean it. 

“Of course it does, you better not keep me waiting like last time either,” Taako said, and some of his confidence didn’t sound entirely genuine. Kravitz hadn’t considered the fact that Taako might be a bit nervous about this as well.

“I’ll try my best. I’m going to have to invest in a watch, it’s difficult trying to gauge time over here,” he said, and he heard Taako humming thoughtfully on the other end. 

“Yeah that makes sense,” he mumbled. “Well, I should get some sleep, now that I have plans tomorrow that are actually worth my attention,” he added. 

“Yes, please get some rest Taako,” he said, now that he was certain that elves did sleep, or at least needed rest. 

“Mhmm, you too, if that’s a thing you can do,” Taako said, and Kravitz had to stop and think about that for a moment. 

“I’m not actually sure, I’ve never tried,” he said, and the laugh that Taako let out at that sounded incredulous. 

“Well _fuck_ my man, we’re gonna have to change that,” he said, and Kravitz could practically hear the smile in his voice. “But some other time. See you tomorrow Krav,” Taako said.

“See you tomorrow, Taako,” Kravitz replied before the stones of farspeech went quiet. He couldn’t stop smiling, and it was ridiculous. he was ridiculous right now, but he was excited for tomorrow. He was actually happy, and it was so different from being simply content. 

It took him a while to notice the difference, it wasn’t anywhere near the bright flash of heat from when Taako’s hands had brushed his.

But unmistakably something, somewhere deep inside of him, was beginning to feel _warm._

**Author's Note:**

> Taako gives Kravitz a watch on their first date so he's not late anymore and Kravitz is beyond smittened. I just had to throw that out there because if i actually wrote out their whole date as well this fic would never fucking end. I'm actually pretty proud of this oneshot though, Kravitz is a lot of fun to write! 
> 
> as always, thanks fro reading and I hope you enjoyed!


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